I meditated tonight while listening to a “Zen” music track, which was basically just a looped sound effect of running water with some Japanese instruments played over it. It triggered ASMR like crazy, and I was basically sitting down with a huge grin on my face as my body was overwhelmed by bliss. I really needed that, as I’ve found myself physically, mentally, and emotionally tired as of late.
However, I’ve scheduled two interviews for internships yesterday, I had an incredible session of meditation, and I am going to have a full night of sleep tonight – so it feels like all of the tired parts of myself are washing away now. Life works like that no? You peak and fall, peak and fall, like a sin wave. Without getting tired now and then, I wouldn’t push myself to reach peaks.
Am I at a peak right now? I don’t think so. I’m in a rebound stage. I’m on my way to a peak. That peak could be a good weekend, or a good job interview, or any number of things. Maybe I’ll have a great time with my roommates this weekend, or rediscover a great old game from my childhood, or learn a new song on the synthesizer, or make a new acquaintance.
IN OTHER NEWS
I’m waking up tomorrow to watch the America v. Canada Women’s Hockey game. I think it could be fun, and I might try to turn it into a writing exercise of sorts. I haven’t watched many Olympic sports this year, save for Ice Dancing, and man, that was some very impressive stuff.
I picked up a copy of the New York Times today, I’m not sure why. There’s a photo of the Kiev riots on the front I believe. I think discussions in English today, regarding how few young people read newspapers, made me feel obligated to pick one up. They’re free for students and there was still a full stack of the day’s papers at 6PM.
For two months I’ve had pieces of art in and out of my Society6 shopping cart, staring at the two empty spaces on my wall, driving me crazy about what and when to purchase something. It’s not the only thing driving me crazy these days, but it’s the most ridiculous by far. It’s about time that I just made the purchase and got it over with.
between my journal, this blog, notepad++, essays, and notes to myself written throughout my binder, there are five or more outlets with which i let myself think through my issues, and tell stories about my life, and sometimes it gets weird, because it feels like with each outlet, there’s a completely different record of my life, a different tone, a different character, different motivations, and i feel the need to tie all of these narratives together, to type them all out onto a single document, because i find myself forgetting who i’ve told what, or where certain parts of the story are, and it’s like i’m telling my story more often than ever, but it’s spread thinner and thinner.