What’s Up? (9/3/15)

Back In The Game
The plan is to apply myself even harder to the task of finding work. New month, fresh restart, new strategies. On day two, I ran into one of the most egregiously designed job applications ever. I penned a T-form cover letter for the first time, which was good experience. I attached my favorite professor’s letter of recommendation. I spent over an hour, taking a personality quiz, and filling out forms. Then, at stage 12 out of 12, a survey: how many years have you worked in the ____ industry? Have you ever worked in ____? I answered. The survey found that I was ineligible to work because I failed to meet their requirements. Two hours were down the drain. I saw those cold words: “Sorry.” Sorry you don’t have as many years of experience as we’re looking for. Except, that was never a part of the job description. Even  if it was, and I was trying to shoot above my weight, why not put that survey at stage 1 out of 12? Why make me fill out form after form, and take a personality quiz, only to have the last stage lock me out?

The last thing I need is to feel like I’ve wasted my time. You don’t need to hire me if I don’t meet your requirements, but let me feel like I had a shot.  A little courtesy is all I ask.

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What’s Up? (11/4/13)

I nodded off in bed while reading my assignment for English literature, and experienced an interesting conflict in my brain.  I was overheating, wearing too many layers, but comfortable, and the sleep felt so good. Part of me wanted to stay asleep, to wake up from this nap at 8AM, struggling to finish assignments by 10AM, or giving up all together. Of course the other part of me, the louder part, insisted otherwise. Handing in quality assignments on time is in our better interest, in the long-run, and a shitty, sweaty sleep is a selfish short-term want.

So, I’m here now, writing in the wake of choosing the working side, over the sleeping side. It’s an attempt to stay awake, and a chance to get things off my chest that are of immediate importance.

For instance: I hate Fantasy Football, and I wish I never played it. Fantasy Football is ruining Sundays for me. A day which, without Football, has absolutely nothing going for it.  And instead of just watching some good old games, I’m watching a bunch of individual players that are owned by this guy, or that guy,  and I want these players to do well, but not these players. And you know what? Part of the reason I’m so bitter about it is that I’m just bad at it. It’d be one thing if I just had a poor roster, but I have a decent roster that I don’t know what to do with. I could have won a game tonight, but I benched a dude that scored over forty points. And the people in my league, my friends, suck. I’m so tired of hearing them talk seriously about football, I’m so tired of them offering me bad trades because they think I’m an absolute idiot when it comes to football. I’m tired of it. I’ve blocked our Fantasy League from my Facebook Feed, I’m going to refuse to do anything about how bad my team is, and I’m going to pretend it doesn’t exist from here on out.

On Recovering From Bad Days

Things were going well today, I slept amazing after only getting three hours of sleep the previous night. I had a tasty, if not rushed breakfast. I had a delicious second breakfast a few hours later. Media and consumer culture was interesting as ever, and Dr. Paterson’s charming British accent and soft voice could lift the dreariest spirits. However, during Small Group Communications I kind of lost “it.” This of no fault of Mr. Dutcher, but during the class my mind was flooded with all sorts of fears, regrets, paranoia, thoughts of loneliness and of sexual desires. These were by no means day-dreams I allowed myself but rather a constant storm of thoughts that I tried and failed to brush off. The class ended and I raced to get home and relax. On the way I filled up my water thermos and proceeded to drop it and spill the entire contents all over Posvar Hall. I saw people staring at me. I picked up the now empty thermos and just walked out of there as fast as possible, embarrassed and angry. On the way home I abandoned my usual confidence with crossing the street in front of cars and instead waited for all the cars to get out of the way first, and I cursed my awkwardness. All of this, while in sweltering near 90’s heat and self conscious about my sweaty appearance.

When I got home I didn’t lay down and let myself think about how bad the day was, and try to sleep it off. I did things. I watched dumb Vines, I watched dog videos that made me laugh, I played a little guitar. I went shopping for ingredients, I made a spinach alfredo pizza. On recovering from bad days: have faith in doing things, and keep doing things until things get better.

What’s Up? (9/4/13)

Week two of this Fall Semester is going by fairly well! I am a bit exhausted, but it’s going well. The exhaustion has nothing to do with class so much as it has to do with having a very significant first weekend here at Pitt. This apartment I’m at is awesome, my roommates are awesome, and  I got myself a pair of pink shorts and you know what? I was right. I do totally look alright in them. I’ve been playing a lot of guitar, and have put in a little over two hours so far over at the Pete using the Rowing Machine. Life is good, so far. There’s tranquility in the mind, maybe not in the soul.

It’s going to be a short entry, but I just wanted to throw something here for the sake of never going a week without posting some sort of content.